Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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