Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
no, he came in my armpit
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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