Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
