at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
