right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
