How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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