my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
