She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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