i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
You had me at "let me see your balls"
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
