Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
