Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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