have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
