Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I have demons in me.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
i think i just lost a toe
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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