with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
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