Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
