It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
