Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.

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  (310): she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category. http://tfl.nu/bs6u
  Replies (55) Good night (936) Bad night (11618)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like

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  (757): It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like http://tfl.nu/masc
  Replies (81) Good night (9410) Bad night (1623)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha

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  (717): I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha http://tfl.nu/f9u5
  Replies (40) Good night (4404) Bad night (896)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.

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  (507): So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there. http://tfl.nu/r47h
  Replies (10) Good night (5924) Bad night (778)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.

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  (978): the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year. http://tfl.nu/sg85
  Replies (2) Good night (3495) Bad night (894)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.

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  (267): This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this. http://tfl.nu/d3gm
  Replies (6) Good night (2443) Bad night (851)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable

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  (732): wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable http://tfl.nu/5ca2
  Replies (16) Good night (6695) Bad night (1138)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic

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  (617): There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic http://tfl.nu/g9j9
  Replies (4) Good night (1473) Bad night (708)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...

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  (843): When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"... http://tfl.nu/sfou
  Replies (6) Good night (1963) Bad night (682)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy

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  (443): I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy http://tfl.nu/5ksv
  Replies (5) Good night (491) Bad night (695)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron

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  (620): Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron http://tfl.nu/6cz2
  Replies (3) Good night (562) Bad night (330)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot

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  (973): I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot http://tfl.nu/bffj
  Replies (6) Good night (1200) Bad night (335)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.

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  (612): I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen. http://tfl.nu/6isz
  Replies (2) Good night (454) Bad night (570)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.

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  (845): I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk. http://tfl.nu/wqjr
  Replies (2) Good night (402) Bad night (593)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.

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  (314): Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night. http://tfl.nu/nk99
  Replies (2) Good night (910) Bad night (347)

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