I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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