When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
