shes about as inviting as chlamydia
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
