I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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