i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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