Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Randomize
