I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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