ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize