Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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