so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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