yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
