32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize