Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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