Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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