NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
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