i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
