if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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