Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
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Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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