my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
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