Do vagina's smell?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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