I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize