our cab driver is having phone sex.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
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