I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
