I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
