none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I've blown a few things in my day
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
