Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
she looked like the before picture.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
