ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
