when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
