I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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