Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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