lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
