is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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