Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
